SCREW Myself
I don’t know whom and which should I trust anymore. Who’s my friend and who’s my enemy? I can’t even tell anymore. People around me seems to be weird and some of them are hypocrites. They show their confincing and warm smile to me but in the end they decide to stab me on my back. Mann… is life this complicated? I even became this dumb and I don’t know which is good and bad anymore.
Anyways, I know the lessons in my school are harder than most of the school around, BUT I’ve never thought they are this unsolvable. Now I have no idea how did I qualify to be one of their students. There are tons of people who want my position in this school but couldn’t. And I’ve got feeling that no matter how stupid they are, they are not as stupid as I am. ROFL.
Finals are coming, we’re going to have finals started from December 4 untill 14. I absolutely have no passion to study, I prefer staying late in front of my laptop’s monitor. Well, not only that I am soulless when it comes about studying, I don’t even know what to study. I’m that dumb. I begged my mom to register me to a lesson-tutoring center, at least for two weeks till a month. Just untill the finals finish. My mom said to just study myself because she doesn’t know any good tutoring center. But I made her look around for me. lol. I said that if she doesn’t immidiately register me, there would be no chance for me to pass the finals. So she had no option left, she would be the first one to have a heart attack if I fail.
Nothing Lasts Forever
Now I know that applies on every single case, everything, everywhere, everytime. Before, I’ve always denied that we’ll have to say goodbye to things we love sooner or later. I thought that if we put alot efforts to keep something important to us, we wouldn’t have to lose it. When my friends were in such situation where they’ll have to give away something they love to death just to survive, I would give this stupid advice that I thought could work out, “Just try to keep it, you won’t lose it, really”, then my friends would likely pout because of my unthoughtful advice, and I’ll have no idea what’s going on. lol. I think I was naive, but also stupid. Being too optimistic could sometimes hurt yourself.
I woke up from my super-optimistic dream and expectations today. I realized that there is time for everything. There is time for laughing, there is also time for crying. There is time for loving, there is also time for killing. And there will always be time for receiving, but there is also letting go. We have to learn to live with that.